Shadows in the Dawn
by DJ Nox
Summary: Trapped in a strange world, Edward tries to find a way back home. And Roy will do anything to get him back. RoyxEd, postseries
1. Regrets

_Shadows in the Dawn  
__  
_

Author's note: Well, well. This was my NaNoWriMo '05 novel. Longest fic I've ever written, and probably the longest fic I'll ever write. XD I figured I'd post it up bit by bit here to get an idea of what was good and what was bad about it so I can go back and re-edit it someday. It does get wordy and repetitive at many times, but...hey, I needed to reach 50,000 words somehow. -cough- Anyway. Enjoy. Oh, and a FYI. It's post-series and ignores the movie for the most part (like I do), though I did take a character name (Alfons Heidrich..which I later found out was spelled Heiderich...whatever...) to use for one of the characters here (I think he's introduced next chapter...). He's nothing like the Alfons in the movie, though. And apologies for overly emo characters.

---

_Chapter 1 - Regrets_

The sky was crying, and for the first time in five years, Alphonse Elric could cry with it.

His memories were still a bit fuzzy, and he could not remember many of the details past his childhood…past his mother's death, past the mistake that had cost him so much.

Had cost them so much.

He couldn't decide whether it was fate or simply an unfortunate series of events that led them to this. If they had never attempted the forbidden, would they be where they were today? Or would they be safe, living a normal (albeit uneventful) life in Resembool? But, at the same time, what if the incident was just the spark to set the flame? Perhaps if it weren't that, it would have been something else, and things wouldn't have been as different. The questions were many in Alphonse's mind, and he had brooded on them, despite the fact that there was no one to answer them, no way to know if life had really set a course for he and his brother to end up like this.

There was no body, simply an empty coffin now lying under the cold earth, and a black, marble grave marker.

_Edward Elric  
1899-1915  
Beloved Son and Brother  
Hero of the People_

Al's fingers reached out to press against the stone, running across the engraved words. The 'memorial', so to speak, seemed to Al some kind of mockery of everything Ed had stood for. Had his brother's life really come to this? One of many stones in a cemetery, where people would visit for maybe a few months, leaving flowers that would just wilt with time…

His small hands clenched the sides of the gravestones as the rain mixed with salty tears. Equivalent exchange…where was the equivalent exchange in this, he thought? His body was nothing compared to his brother's life… He would have gladly stayed in the armor as long as it meant that Edward would be safe. His older brother had already made enough sacrifices…this was too much.

"You promised me, brother…promised me that you wouldn't leave me! You got me my body back, but what does it matter if you're not here? What's the point!" he whispered angrily. "You idiot…you complete and total idiot! Everything was a lie… Equivalent exchange, the thing we believed in most…what we based everything on! When did it ever say that I would have to lose you!"

A hand firmly clasped on his shoulder, and Al twisted his gaze to the side. He could see the tears locked in the man's dark eye, and that was enough to send him into another fit of crying. The boy turned and wrapped his arms around the older man's waist, burying his head in his chest as the rain fell down around them.

"Brother…I…I miss him…I want to see him again…he…he shouldn't have…I… I never wanted this to happen…if only…I could have done something…!"

The hand on his shoulder moved, and Al felt strong arms encompass his body, trying to be comforting. But he could feel those very arms shaking. He didn't have to ask why.

"I know. We all feel the same…"

---

"_Edward was...one of the few men I could truly admire. Not many people knew him for who he was…not just a brash, loud, insubordinate child, not the abstract hero he has been painted out to be during his travels, but as the man he really was. He was steadfast in his goals, goals that were entirely selfless. He would, without a second thought, sacrifice his own happiness and desires as long as it meant someone else would be happy. _

"_I have observed, in his four years of serving under me, that although his methods were unorthodox and usually a pain for the military, his intentions were pure. He may have been a dog of the military, but he was no ordinary mutt. Hell, he was no ordinary person. Put anyone else in his shoes, and the likelihood of them surviving and getting through the things he had been through is slim to none."_

_He paused for a moment to take a breath before continuing._

"_Edward was born and grew up in Resembool, a small town to the East…His childhood was spent with his younger brother, Alphonse, and his mother, Trisha. After their mother passed away, the Elric brothers pledged their lives to helping each other… Yet they helped so much more. Edward became a State Alchemist at the age of 12, the youngest ever to achieve that. And whether he had initially meant to or not, he, in his actions, changed the way this country was run. He helped expose the corruption in our military, helped bring this world back to peace._

"_I believe that we have a lot to learn from him. Though he is not with us in the physical sense anymore, we can still feel his presence in what he has left behind. In four short years, he has inspired hope in the hearts of all the people in this nation…something we have been striving to do for centuries."_

_His lips curved into a half smile. "…No matter how inexperienced, and no matter how small, a person still holds the power to change the world. Edward Elric, we salute you." _

---

Roy moved his hand in a circle, watching as the amber liquid in the glass swirled. It was mesmerizing in the way that it could help to take his mind off of things for a precious few moments. But only for a few.

It seemed as if for the past few weeks, _everything _was a distraction when it came right down to it. Anything to distract him from the ache in his chest that had been present there ever since he heard those fatal words:

'Edward Elric has been declared MIA. The search is off. Repeat, Edward Elric has been declared MIA…'

The boy he had watched over for so many years, had cared for, had even _loved…_

It was hard for him to accept the fact that the blond alchemist was gone. Sometimes, he would sit in his office bored, wondering when Edward was going to show up with a report or yelling about one thing or another or…anything, really. It would usually take a few gentle yet firm words from Lieutenant Hawkeye to bring himself back to reality. Or whatever he could see as reality, anyway.

He took another long sip of the alcohol before going back to swirling it around in the glass. If the light hit it just right, it mirrored the color of Edward's eyes…

…and Roy realized that no matter what he did, he wasn't going to be able to keep his mind off of the boy. How long this mourning would last, he couldn't tell. Months? Years? His entire life?

He laughed bitterly. Five short years of knowing Edward, and he was already thinking his entire life was in ruins because he had died? No one could change a person's life in that amount of time, could they?

A few gulps later, Roy came to another realization that yes, it was very much possible, and he was just lying to himself. Edward's actions, his words, his very existence had changed him as a person. He had brought some of the brightness in his own eyes that had dulled after the Ishbal massacre.

His thoughts were coming full circle…as one trail of thought tapered off, it would pick up another, and they would connect in a seemingly unending web of regrets and depression.

_Damn you, Edward Elric. Damn you and your eyes, your stubbornness, your…everything. Damn you for making me depend on someone, after so many years of trying to be independent. Damn you for making me a better man…because I don't know what I'm going to do now, now that you're gone._

His hand around his drinking vessel had tightened, clenching hard enough during his reflection that the glass had shattered. Shards fell onto the floor along with the remains of the alcohol. Roy stared amusedly at his hand, watching as the blood trickled down his skin, dripping off the edges of his palm and falling onto the floor. The pain did not bother him in the slightest…in fact, it barely registered in his mind.

_Wherever the hell you are now, Edward…you took a part of me with you. I want it back. _

---

"_Tell me, Fullmetal…"_

"…_hm?"_

"_Look at yourself. Look at your life, all that you've been through. What keeps you going?"_

"…_what are you talking about, Colonel? The hell brought this up?"_

"_Just answer me."_

"_Well…my brother, obviously. Even though…well, you know what happened…ever since then, I've been wanting to make it up to him. And…while we've been journeying for the stone, we've managed to help out a lot of other people. That keeps us going…that gives us hope, I suppose."_

"_Do you regret anything?"_

"_Yes, but I realize that there's no way I can go back and change them. All I can do is try to make sure it doesn't happen again, and fix things as best as I can. You can't just dwell on your mistakes and wonder what could have been for the rest of your life…you have to actually take action. Otherwise, you're just wasting your life, you know?"_

"…_You've grown, Edward."_

"_What do you mean, you bastard! You calling me short or something!"_

"_Haha…no."_

"_Then what!"_

"…_You've learned a lot, and come a long way. I admire you for that."_

"…_Colonel…?"_

"_Now go scram. I've got paperwork to do."_

"…_yeah, sure." _

---

Roy chuckled, letting his eyes close as he leaned back in his chair. 'How pathetic I am. How completely and utterly _pathetic. _You would have wanted me to move on, huh? Weren't you all about moving forward, fixing your mistakes, but not dwelling on them?'

His laughter faded, and a small smile was left on his face. 'But we never really were good at listening to each other, hm? Maybe if we were…maybe if I _did _learn something from you, I would be moving on, I would be fine. I'd go on with my life, and all would be well. However, things aren't going that way, are they?'

He didn't care what the odds were, or how ridiculous he was being. He didn't care if he was deluding himself.

Edward couldn't be dead. He was too strong for that. He was out there somehow.

And Roy was going to find him, even if it killed him.

---

_Dear Journal,_

_He's gone._

_So they say, anyway._

_Funny how things work out, hm? Look at where I am at. I've just exposed and eliminated the highest and greatest corruption of the military. Becoming Fuhrer is well within my grasp. Eight years, and I've finally done it._

_And the most hilarious part is, I don't even care anymore._

_Maybe it's silly of me. No, I take that back, it _is _ridiculous of me. After all, if I gave up now, I'd just be letting their sacrifices go to waste, right?_

_Maes._

_Edward._

_Who ever said that success and happiness go hand in hand? It seems, I have learned, that one is forced to pick one or the other._

_There's been a funeral. They say he's dead, but I can't bring myself to believe that he's gone down this easily._

_He's still alive out there somewhere, I know. And I _will _find him._

_-Roy_


	2. Introductions

_Shadows in the Dawn_

Author's note: Don't own FMA, etc, stole alter!Al's name from the movie but not his personality, details in the author's note of the last chapter, blah blah blah. Enjoy.

---

_Chapter 2 - Introductions_

"…I'll give you ten marks for it."

"Twenty five."

"Fifteen."

"Twenty, and that's my final offer."

"…fine."

A hand reached out to snatch the loaf of bread that had been lying on the counter. He replaced it with his payment before quickly making his way out of the shop. "Inflation…fuckin' ridiculous," he muttered before taking a bite.

Edward Elric had been stuck in Germany for a total of six months so far, and things were not looking up in the slightest bit. Six months since he had been dumped into this strange place with no idea on how to get home. Five months of working odd jobs here and there in order to scrape up enough money to pay rent for a shabby one room apartment. Two months of learning the odd, harsh language enough so that he was able to communicate for the most part. And the entire time, researching on a way to get back.

Much to his dismay, it seemed as if he could not use alchemy in this world. Even if he drew a circle, nothing would happen, no matter how hard he tried…all of his attempts were utterly futile. And yet, regardless of this major setback, giving up never once crossed his mind. There had to be another way, he kept telling himself. His world had alchemy…and while this world did not, it had something else. Science.

Chemistry, physics…these things were different, yet at the same time extremely similar to alchemy. The heart of the matter was the same. And it was because of this that Edward found himself delving into any scientific book or research paper he could get his hands on. The language barrier was difficult to overcome, but he had managed to read through at least some of the material. Fascinating as it was, however, it did not yet hold any of the clues he was looking for. He wasn't about to give up hope, though.

There was one bit of luck in his studies so far, however; or at least, something that would help further them. And along with it, a rather shocking observation.

---

_Edward strolled into the pub, hands in his pockets. He had been coming there pretty much every other night since about a week into his sentence here…normally, he was never one for alcohol, but it seemed now like it was the only comfort he was going to find in this world._

_He sat down at the counter and ordered his usual, knowing full well that even though he looked too young (and he was), they didn't bother checking any form of identification here. Which was good, because he currently lacked that, anyway._

_The glass mug was slid across the counter to him, and he picked it up with his left hand, taking no time in gulping a good amount of it down. The more he was drinking lately, the more it was taking to get him to a state where he didn't have to think…and he was impatient to reach that point. 'Oh, how the mighty have fallen…'_

_He had been on his third drink when he noticed someone sitting on the stool next to him. Usually, the pub was rather empty, and people had a tendency to sit far away from each other. He blinked a few times before turning to see who had decided that they wanted to sit with beside him._

"_Oh, ah, hey. Sorry if I'm disturbing you, but…you looked pretty lonely, all hunched up here like that," the man said, rubbing the back of his head. No…you really couldn't call him a man, he looked not much older than Edward to begin with._

_Ed blinked blearily at him for several moments, looking at his appearance. Something about this man was strangely familiar…the light blue eyes were different, but the facial structure…Somehow, he had a feeling he should _know _this man in some way, and it was gnawing at him._

"_Uh…it's alright. I'm fine over here…no different from all the other miserable people drinking here, really," Ed said, shrugging. "Thanks for the concern, though…"_

_The other man nodded with a small smile. "Sometimes in a tough city like this, it's nice to feel like someone cares about you once in a while. I figured I might as well spread a little kindness…heh. Some call me hopelessly optimistic, but what can you do? Ah…I'm rambling here, forgive me. What's your name, if you don't mind giving it?"_

"…_Edward Elric."_

"_Hello, then, Edward! My name is Alfons Heidrich."_

…_Alfons._

…_Alphonse?_

_Golden eyes widened as Ed realized just /where/ he had seen that face before. It was as if…as if this man was an older version of his little brother. Now that he could make this connection, he studied him further, amazed at the likeness._

"…_Edward?"_

_Except for the eyes…and the hair was lighter, but…_

"…_Helloooo, Ed?"_

"_Oh…sorry about that," Ed muttered, smiling sheepishly. "You just really remind me of someone I used to know, that's all."_

_Alfons' smiled widened. "Well, it's good to see a semi-familiar face then, isn't it?"_

_Edward couldn't help but smile a little back. Alfons' cheerfulness was…infectious, to put it in a word. It was something that he hadn't been around in a long time, and at this point in time, was extremely welcome. "I guess you're right."_

"_So what brings you here to Germany? I can tell from how you speak the language that it isn't your first…" Alfons asked, taking a moment to order a drink of his own._

"_Ah…that's…" Ed was slightly taken aback. What was he supposed to say? 'I got dumped here from the Gate when I brought my little brother back to life after he sacrificed himself to revive my own dead corpse?' It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that that wasn't going to go over well. "…Studying, really." Hey, it wasn't a complete lie._

"_Studying what?" Alfons asked, eyes curious. His drink had arrived, so he took a moment to take a sip of it before his gaze returned to Edward._

"_Well…science in general. Chemistry, physics…I haven't really gotten a chance to look into these subjects before, and they interested me a lot, so I figured I might as well read up on them and learn as much as I can. Where I came from, there wasn't much about those particular branches of science," he answered truthfully. "Here, they might have more…"_

"_Where are you from, then?" Alfons questioned._

"…_Eh. A good distance from here, let's just say," Ed muttered, not wanting to go into the 'I'm from another world' business._

_Alfons nodded, putting a hand on his shoulder. "It's alright, I'll respect your privacy. Anyway, you said you came here to study science, right?"_

"_That's right."_

"_This is a funny coincidence…I guess there was a reason for us meeting. You see, I'm majoring in physics at the university I go to…" Alfons said. "And I have tons of books on the subjects, so I can share some knowledge with you, if you want."_

_Ed's eyes widened slightly. This was…something was actually going right? For the first time in six months, things were beginning to look up. He felt a rush of happiness over him…maybe now that he wasn't alone…this Alfons wanted to help him…_

_Alfons waved his hand in front of Edward's face, trying to grab his attention again. "Earth to Edward! You alive there? You keep spacing out…"_

"_A-ah, sorry again," Ed chuckled. "It's just that…well, things have been pretty rough for me, so I'm amazed that something's looking up, you know?"_

"_I see…so you'll take my offer, then? I'm always looking for a new friend and people to help out…"_

_Ed nodded. "Yes, it sounds wonderful…I…thank you so much." _

"Here…" Alfons muttered as he dug through his jacket pockets. A few moments later, he produced a piece of paper (which Ed noticed was a receipt from a bookstore). He pulled a pen out of his shirt pocket, and placing the paper against the counter, wrote down his name, address, and phone number. "My contact information. When you're ready to come by and such, feel free to. I go to school on weekdays, and my classes usually last until five or six in the afternoon, but after that I'm free. Weekends are good, too."

Ed reached out and took the paper, examining it. The address wasn't too far from where he himself was staying, probably just a twenty or thirty minute walk. "Alright, thanks. I still need some time to get my financial affairs in order…having a bit of a trouble with the job market, you know, and I still have to pay rent, so that's first and foremost at the time."

"I understand. You haven't been here long, have you?" Al asked curiously.

"No," Ed answered, shaking his head. "I've been here for about six months, and it's been…hard to adjust. Between learning the language and well, everything else that comes with living here…"

Alfons chuckled. "You seem like you just dove headfirst into this country without knowing anything about it, if you don't mind my saying."

"You could…say it was something like that," Ed said, scratching the back of his head. "Let's just say it's very complicated."

"That's alright, I won't pry. Everyone has their reasons for things." Al nodded before looking up at the clock on the nearby wall. "Oh…it's getting late. I ought to head home, my cats need feeding." He ended the statement with a chuckle.

"…Cats?" Ed asked, almost incredulous. The coincidences were starting to get stranger than they already had been.

Al blinked at him. "Yes…is there something wrong? I've always been a cat person…well, I guess it is kind of strange, a guy my age taking care of a bunch of cats like some old lady…"

"No, no, that's not it," Ed laughed, making a dismissive gesture with his hands. "It's just…the person from back home that you remind me of really liked cats too."

"Ah…"

"Well, I guess I'll see you around, then. Thanks so much, Alfons…it was great to meet you" Ed said, holding out his hand.

Alfons grasped it firmly, shaking it. "I'm sure this is the beginning of a great friendship."

---

He had met Alfons Heidrich a week ago, and now seemed as good a time as ever to visit him. Besides, Edward had just gotten fired from his latest job at a mechanical shop (oh, if only Winry could see him now), and job hunting wasn't looking very appealing to him at the moment.

Ed pulled the wrinkled slip of paper where Alfons had written his address and phone number out of his coat pocket. He glanced at the hastily scribbled numbers and letters before moving his gaze to the nearest street sign. 'Good, at least I'm going the right way,' he thought as he resumed his walking.

It was early morning, and the streets of the town were beginning to bustle with activity. Newspaper boys were making their rounds, and the working class was trudging to their jobs. Shops on either side of the street were opening their shutter gates and flipping over the sign in the front window from 'Closed' to 'Open.'

Despite the amount of people surrounding him, he felt…alone. Lost, mostly. He just hoped now that things were actually taking a turn for the better. He sped up his pace… Right now, he just wanted someone to talk to who wasn't yelling at him because of his utter incompetence (though, he kept thinking to himself, it wasn't _really_ his fault…after all, he was never used to having a job, so there was still a learning curve, right?).

He smiled when he noticed he was just a few blocks from his destination. He would see this Alfons again, and hopefully with his help, discover some clues on how he could get back home. Though, he had already realized, he had to do it in a way that the other man would not know exactly _why_ he needed to know these things…he didn't want to freak Al out with talk about another world, and besides, Al probably wouldn't believe him anyway. It was best just to stick with his cover story.

Maybe it would pay to be optimistic again, even if just for a little while.

---

_Dear Journal,_

_It's been six months since I've been stuck in this hellhole. But I think things are finally looking up._

_I met a guy named Alfons Heidrich today. Coincidental name, huh? But it doesn't stop there. He even _looks _like an older Al, in a way. And he acts like him. And he likes kittens. Maybe I'm just being too excited over this new development, and all of this is just some strange ass coincidence, but…it's pretty interesting._

_I guess you could say that seeing him helped and hurt. It was nice to see a face that was at least somewhat familiar…and of all the faces I want to see, Al's ranks number one. But at the same time, it's painful, because I realize again that my little brother is so far away from me, back home._

_I've never been homesick in my life up until now. Gods, what I'd give to just go back to Resembool, to Winry and Auntie's house, and relax for a good, long time. I miss them. I miss everyone, really. I even miss arguing with that bastard Colonel._

_Huh, I wonder whatever happened to him. Eh, he's too much of an ass to die that easily. I'm sure I'll see him too when I get back._

_Well, enough of that. I have to get up early for work again tomorrow. I think I prefer being a dog of the military over this crap._

_-Edward_


	3. Warmth

_Shadows in the Dawn_

Author's note: Same disclaimer as usual, Heidrich is nothing like how he is in the movie (I guess, anyway, I've still yet to see it), still think I could have characterized him a bit better and not made him such a damn girl, oh well, whatever, enjoy.

---

_Chapter 3 - Warmth_

Alfons fretted about his apartment, trying to get it into some semblance of order. Glasses on the tables needed to be washed and put away, books needed to be shoved back into their shelves…at least his two cats had already been fed. Al wasn't a messy person by nature, but he had grown more than a little lazy due to his utter lack of guests in the past few weeks.

"He could have at least given me more than an hour's warning…" Al grumbled as he grabbed the last dirty glass on the coffee table. He wasn't so much annoyed at the young man he had met, though, but more so at himself for having left the place in such a state of disarray that he had to run around like some sort of headless chicken to fix it up into a proper state for visitors.

His hand twisted the water faucet on, and after making sure the hot water wasn't going to scald him, took a nearby rag, and poured some soap onto it. He hummed to himself a senseless tune as he washed what glasses and plates were in the sink. 'Let's see…should probably put a pot of coffee up…' he thought to himself as he placed the glass and porcelain items onto the drying rack. 'It's been too long since someone was over. Two months, maybe? And even then, it was just casual visits…'

Al chuckled as he shut the water off, stretching his body up slightly in order to reach the top cabinet where he kept the coffee jar. He flicked open the cabinet door before snatching the jar (making a mental note to himself to keep the stuff in a more accessible place, because there had been one too many incidents where he had fallen right into the sink in the mornings in his quest for coffee).

At this point in his life, he could make the beverage with his eyes closed, though he wasn't about to try that in fear of burning himself. Regardless, he filled up the coffee maker with water, enough to make a few cups, scooped in the ground beans, shut the machine, and hit the button.

He sat at the kitchen table, watching the dark brown liquid drip. He lay his elbow onto the table and rested his chin in his hand, sighing. Still, a smile was on his face, and he was happily anticipating meeting his new friend again.

---

Alfons Heidrich, age 18. Ethnicity: German. Occupation: University student. Parents: Deceased.

He was what most called a model student. Intelligent beyond his years, hardworking… Al was an extremely friendly person, though some might say he was too friendly for his own good. His amiability and compassion, though both good traits, came at a price, as he was easily taken advantage of at many times. However, it wasn't enough to change his way of thinking or acting.

Even though both his parents had died a few years previous, Alfons still had the strength to keep a sunny and cheerful disposition. If he couldn't even bring himself to be happy, how could he help others? And so he focused on trying to make life as pleasant as he could for him and people around him.

It may have been a lost cause, especially in the time and place he was in, but it wouldn't stop him from trying.

---

He jolted to attention when he heard a knock coming from the front door. 'Only two minutes late…' Al thought as he glanced at the clock, before he stood up and made his way out of the kitchen, into the living room, and to the door. "Who is it?" he asked, even though he already knew who he was.

"Uh, Edward," called the voice from the other side.

Alfons smiled, unlocking the door and opening it, standing aside to let the younger blonde in. "It's good to see you again. I apologize if my house is a bit of a mess, I just haven't had visitors in a while, so…" he trailed off.

Edward looking around the apartment, letting out a low whistle. "You call this messy? You should see my dumpster of a place. Well, it'd be a lot more messy if I actually _had _things to leave lying around, but…damn." His eyes moved to the couch. "…can I use your couch?"

Al raised an eyebrow. Now that was a strange question. "Uh…sure, go ahead…?"

At least Ed had the good grace to take off his partially muddy boots before flopping down on the couch. "Ahhh, this feels so good…it's been so long since I've been able to lie on something soft…" he murmured, looking as if he just entered through the gates of heaven.

"…Don't you have a bed, at least?" Al asked, his other eyebrow raising as well.

"Nah, just some blankets and a pathetic excuse for a pillow. Like I might have said before, my financial situation ain't too good. I can barely afford rent as it is, so furniture at this point in time is out of the question."

"I see…" Al said, moving over to sit in the chair beside the couch. "Do you have a job?"

"Yeah, but I just got laid off yesterday, so I have to look around for another one."

Al blinked. It seemed like Edward was having no luck at all with, well, anything. "How old are you anyway? You look pretty young to be out on your own, even in a place like this."

He noticed Edward twitch a few times, but decided it best not to ask why. "Just about seventeen," the other responded. "And you?"

"Nineteen," Al responded, standing up. "Would you like some coffee, by the way?"

Ed nodded. "Sure."

"How would you like it?" Alfons asked as he made his way to the kitchen. "Milk, sugar, what?"

"Black with, uh, four sugars," he heard the voice from the living room respond. No milk and an excessive amount of sugar…yes, this Edward was a strange one, but what could he say. He pulled out two mugs from a side cabinet, placing them down on the counter. Next came the milk for himself, and he took the container out of the refrigerator before pouring a little into his cup.

Alfons heard a few meows coming from the room, and smiled. It looked as if Ed had come into contact with his cats. 'Well, I just hope he's a cat person,' he thought.

It was probably good for Al that he didn't hear what had happened just previous to those meows, which was a small feline yelp and Ed hissing 'Oh shit did I just sit on the cat!'.

The coffee was poured and the sugar mixed in before Alfons strode back into the living room. "Here, it should be good," he said as he put the mugs down onto the coffee table. "It's hot so be care--…Edward…?"

He stared at the boy on his couch, whose eyes were now closed, a soft snore escaping him. His arm was slung around a pillow as if he was cuddling it close to him like some sort of stuffed animal. The sight was rather cute, he had to admit.

Alfons chuckled, taking his own mug off coffee and sipping it. Well, they were in no rush. Besides, Edward looked like he really needed the sleep… And there was also a look on Ed's face that he hadn't yet seen, an expression of peace. Even when his face had lit up with a smile at the prospect of getting help, he could still see a kind of pain there, something that had seemed to be permanently etched into his features. But now… He looked even younger than his---what was it, almost seventeen?---years like this, and Al wondered how such an innocent looking person could be driven into such harsh circumstances.

There was a lot more to Ed than he let on, that much was obvious, but Alfons could wait. He didn't feel like prying. He would help Edward as much as he can, regardless of whatever situation he had gotten himself into.

---

_Dear Journal,_

_I've met a new friend by the name of Edward Elric. He's a little strange…not much younger than me, but…well. He says he came here to study science, so that's why I'm helping him out. But it's as if he came here with no idea of what he was getting into. He doesn't hold a steady job, he says he can barely afford the rent…When you move to another place, you usually make sure you have enough money to cover your lodgings until you can manage to get a steady job, don't you? Well, I wouldn't know, since I've lived in this town for ages, and until I finish university and get my own job, I'm living off inheritance…_

_Well, besides that, he seems like a pretty smart person, but he isn't in school. Why he hasn't enrolled in a university or something, I have no idea._

_I wonder if there's some other reason for him being here._

_Oh well, I shouldn't be complaining. It's been lonely for the past two months, so having someone to talk to and spend time with again is more than welcome._

…

_I wonder how long he'll be gone for. He said it would only be a few months, so… Eh. He still hasn't written so much as a postcard. I'm not worried or anything, he can properly take care of himself, but… Well, he'd probably just call me silly for acting like this. So I'll just have to wait._

_Still, I miss him a lot._

_I miss him, I miss him, I miss him, I miss him._

_I'm probably being horribly clingy, and heck, I'm not a woman or anything, so I shouldn't be. Oh, what does it matter anymore. I'm horribly attached, and that's that. Nothing I can do about it._

_Funny how some people call it wrong. Well, I don't care. Let them…it doesn't affect me._

_Okay, I'm wasting ink now, and Edward looks like he's about to fall off the couch. I better make sure he doesn't hurt himself or anything. He could probably use a blanket too. Jeez, when's the last time he had a decent sleep? I could see the dark circles under his eyes now that I'm really looking._

_Hm, Beansprout looks ticked off for some reason, and his fur's all messed up. I better give him some catnip or milk or something. I wonder what happened?_

_-Alfons_


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